sugarcrook

iBooks should be issued as survival gear. They’re more reliable at catching fire than sterno.

Doctors in Shanghai on Tuesday were considering surgery options for a 2-month-old boy born with an unusually well-formed third arm.

2 AM hits and I’m just hitting my stride. Armed with vodka on the rocks, I can churn code or write until the wee hours until I finally pass out next to my girlfriend who rises at 5:whatthefuckever AM. But not this week.

No, this week I’ve been racking out around 11 PM so I can get more out of my mornings. And that’s been enlightening. Get up around 7ish, shower, make some coffee. Start work. Then the phone calls roll in. And the emails. And instant messages. Finally, the cats need attention. Clocking maybe 60 minutes of work in 4 hours, I feel like I’m back working for The Man again.

And it’s been this week that I remember why I do my best work at night: to get away from people.

Paul McCartney and Heather Mills are splitting up. They claim it’s because they don’t have a private life. I think she just wants a burger.¹

1. For those that don’t know, McCartney is a vegetarian. Or vegan. Whatever. He’s a pussy.

Walking to Cafe Sushi last week, we were entertained by the Walgreens manager wrestling a woman to the ground. She’d apparently stolen something and threatened him with a needle.

The entire spectacle was especially fun for the southsider that joined us for the sushi expedition. She claimed that such things don’t happen in Sox-land, but having been to 87th and Western, I have to call bullshit.

Either through combat or drinking, Old Town is always fun.

My favorite grocery store near me has to be the Dominck’s on Clybourne, near Costco and Menard’s. It’s big, clean and the food looks great. The wealth of attractive women doesn’t hurt, but that’s a different post.

Leaving Dominick’s with a few bags of gear, a very excited guy tried to sell me a home theater. Out of the back of his SUV. Nevermind the legality of it - who’s going to the grocery store with a few hudred bucks to buy stolen merch? Jackass. I told him to put it on Craig’s List. Maybe he’s dumb enough to try it.

I’m in DC again for another project that finished up Thursday night. At one point during the wrap-up, I needed a break to get out of the heat and visited a nearby Burger King. (Nothing else around. Piss off.) Being a metro ‘King, this location had a basement for additional seating. The basement was also a few degrees cooler, so I headed downstairs.

Walking down the stairs I spotted a woman in red lingerie with a curling iron. Curling her hair. In Burger King. “Lingerie” might be a bit strong. Red pants of some sort, but her top was see-through. And she was well past her prime, which is to say the girls were well on their way to her navel.

I don’t have a problem with anybody trying to earn a living. Rent has to be paid, and that crack ain’t free. But I was understandably shocked to see the same ho walking into my event with her john for the evening. Even the cops working security took a second glance.